KRUSHING THE TOUR: Stage 3

Enough with the Halloween costume, bro. You are not a climber, and we all know it.

This morning I felt like someone switched my morning orange juice with Jägermeister. What happened to the Tour de France? The first week and a half is supposed to be boring, predictable, breakaway-gets-caught-sprinters-sprint type stages! You know, like yesterday's.

Well, as much as I love orange juice (I actually don't), I love me some Jäger.

Before we go and get all happy-dappy over another stage with no mention of the Sky train, or Mark Cavendish, let's get a few complaints out of the way.

It was nice to see Morkov go on the break for a third day in a row, in search of a few more crumbs, but that polka-dot helmet has got to go. Please. It's tacky and an insult to real climbers; guys who have fought in the real mountains in the past, for the honor to wear the hideous jersey. Climbers like Tony Rominger, Lucien Van Impe, Luis Herrera, Federico Bahamontes, and Marco Pantani, have worn the red spots with pride and earned that right with their sweat and pain. For some random track yahoo to come out and cheapen the Dots is a disgrace. Of course, I know that the jersey has to be worn for sponsorship commitments, and of course Morkov is the leader of the competition, but to "over-celebrate" it by wearing the helmet that Sax-off probably created for Chris Anker Sorensen is just lame.

Another very important issue that needs to be addressed is that of Astana's Andriy Grivko's Ukrainian National Champion kit. The ASO and the UCI should not allow the kit to look so different that the rest of the team's. It confuses me and it makes the rest of Astana's riders jealous. "How come Grivko doesn't have to wear hideous teal, but we do?"

On to better things:
- BMC and Evans once again showed to be in pretty good shape and I hope it's a foreshadowing of an awesome face-off in the mountains between the Australian and Wiggins. I just hope Evans doesn't kill all his energy chasing air-time in early stage finishes, like he did today and Sunday.

- Sylvain Chavanel's attack today had me rooting for a Frenchman. That is a hard thing to do. Not because I hate French riders, but because they hardly ever make anyone cheer.

- Peter Sagan is an absolute beast and his running-man celebration today was epic. Not Rapha epic, but "I can show this to my mom and she'll laugh" epic.

Unrelated, Marcel Kittel and his diarrhea (in white shorts), arrived over 16 minutes back.

Tomorrow's stage is probably gonna be dumb.

Dumb? We will see.